qos: (Beanstalk)
So yes, belly dance class last night put me in a positive headspace . . . but last night it took me forever to fall asleep (which is what happened the previous week as well).

This morning I'm tired, a bit sore, and facing a long day.

Tomorrow morning is Lodge (60 miles away).

Does anyone have any tips for how to quiet the body after evening exertions so sleep comes more easily? I don't want to be awake half the night after every class!


ETA: I went back and changed the title of this entry. I've been alternately laughing at myself and kicking myself when I read my old entries and see how many are titled with such vivid subjects as "Monday Morning" and "Tired." I'm going to do better this time around.
qos: (Gypsy Free)
I had my second belly dance class this evening.

As I may have mentioned before, dance does not come easily to me -- and this evening I started to figure out why.

I've been focused so much on "doing it right" that I lost track of the fact that I was supposed to be dancing. The moves became much easier when I stopped being quite so grimly concentrated and focused more on enjoying the movement.

Don't get me wrong: my abdominals still aren't quite sure what it is I'm asking them to do half the time, and my feet aren't used to half-steps and half-turns, but I can imagine a time in the not-too-distant future when the techniques will start to sink in.

This class feels a lot friendlier than the one I took thirteen years ago. The previous class was an ongoing one, whereas this one is a six-week "Basics" course. There are a lot of experienced dancers in the group, but I don't constantly feel like I'm being left behind. The women are more welcoming than the other group was too, although still a bit cliquish. But I really like the instructor.

This last week has been challenging. Last Thursday I left work early because I was having a bad mental health day, and I took the next day off. Then the smoke rolled in, and that was stressful. On top of that, I've been doing User Acceptance Testing at work, and while I'm excited about the tool, the test was not set up well. It's confusing and frustrating -- the more so because of how important it is. (It's a national project.) It would have been very easy to stay home from class tonight, but after class I felt better than I have since last Thursday. My whole body has gotten a relatively gentle workout, my lower back feels much freer, and I'm in a much better head space.

I need a new dancing icon. I found some good images, but don't have the time to crop and adjust this evening. . .

ETA: The only problem is that now it's late evening and I'm very, very hungry!
qos: (Elizabeth Volta)
You have to understand: this is a big deal.

One of the things that has been on my wistful to-do list (the list of things that I think would be wonderful, but I have never made enough of a priority to do more than stick my toe into, if that) is bellydancing. A year or so ago I went to a class, but despite [livejournal.com profile] pathdancer's companionship and encouragement, I felt too awkward and embarrassed by my body and lack of looseness/control over my midsection to be comfortable in a room full of women who had not just the moves but the clothes as well. There were some lovely moments, but in the end, I just was not comfortable.

So two nights ago, as part of my current "Ultimate" plan, I took out the DVD set "Sacred Bellydance" (which I bought months ago) and started working with it. And it was hard. Hip circles just don't work well when you're used to holding yourself straight and tucked, and not accentuate that part of yourself. And talk about Water! Jehane's whole body flowed and rippled as if she had no bones at all.

A Queen of Swords beginning to bellydance is a somewhat absurd creature: all stiffness and pointy joints.

So I put away the DVD and took out my S-Factor Workout book, which starts with a long series of stretches and moves designed to loosen and release the hips and pelvic region, emphasizing circles and sensuality. And while I was doing Reverse Spinal Rolls something clicked in the back of my brain, and I stopped focusing on "doing it right" and instead just concentrated on making a circle with my head, and feeling the circle, and doing it with my spine and not my shoulders.

Suddenly I was moving freely, almost ecstatically. Everything shifted into another key.

I stretched for another ten minutes or so, and still had ten minutes on my workout time, so I put on a marvelous piece called "Lionheart" by Angels of Venice, and I closed my eyes and started to dance. I didn't worry about 'right moves' or how I looked (which is why I had to keep my eyes closed), or anything else. I released my body to follow the music.

I danced in a way I don't think I've ever danced before without a couple of drinks in me. And it felt great.

I'm going to take this slowly, and I'm not going to worry about "right." I'm going to use the exercises to get my body moving, open up and stretch these muscles (the mental/emotional as well as the physical) and when I feel comfortable with my body and with my own movement, then maybe I'll take a class again. Yes, I may have to 'unlearn' some technique -- but that's better than being too stiff and self-conscious to learn in the first place.
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