New Sword Woman Art!

I just created this icon, based on ( This image called Martel's Sword, which I found on the Trikinggames site )

ETA: Thanks to oakmouse who clued me in to the fact that Charles Martel was a historical warrior-king (and grandfather of Charlemagne). According to lore, it was his sword that Joan of Arc found when her Voices told her to search behind a particular altar to find her weapon. It is also said that the rust came away "as if by magic" when she went to clean it.

So this appears to be an image of Joan -- or a woman who is inheriting her legacy.

Centered

I was just going through an old notebook, sifting out what information and creative work needed to be transferred and what I should let go of -- and I found something that made me feel very good.

There's a page from July of 2006 that is full of notes about various archetypal roles, heroines, totems, tools, correspondences, and etc. I was trying to make a map of all the different elements of myself and find some way to make it coherent.

On the other side is the title "The Same Damn List" and it's four columns (each a different area of my life) of issues that I felt needed to be changed/improved/dealt with. They aren't lengthy lists, but they were depressing in the persistence of the items on them, stuff I'd never managed to get a handle on or overcome.

As I set the page aside, deciding I didn't need to keep it, I realized how far I've come since then. I no longer feel the need to map and label the parts of myself to try to pin down a sense of identity and purpose. I've dealt with a fair number of the items on that Damn List.

I feel centered, whole. I have far more confidence in myself as a whole person than I did last year.

It's a good feeling.

Beyond the Gate

At the beginning of September, I posted about finally "achieving" the Gate: making my way (on the inner) to a particular gate and looking through it. This was much more difficult than it sounds, and even though I finally got there, my assignment was not complete. There was more for me to understand about what I was seeing. That was clear to me, even without the confirmation from my teacher.

This morning, after doing yoga and The Rising Light Below, I sat down to pray. After a while I realized that it was time to go back to the Gate.

I had been assuming (hoping!) that once I'd found my way there it would be easy in the future. No such luck. Fortunately, there was someone powerful who was willing to help.

What I had seen the first time was very much like the image in this icon, although I didn't understand what (or who?) it was. It was very beautiful, obviously powerful, and completely incscrutable to me.

( Finding my past and my future )

List of Practices

One of my ongoing challenges -- not just in my spiritual life, but everywhere -- is my tendency to be an all-or-nothing personality. If I can't do it all, and do it absolutely right, I'm not going to bother. The problem is, there are plenty of areas of life, especially the spiritual life, in which it is far better to do what one can, as well as possible, rather than do nothing at all.

So to help myself never be in a position of feeling like "I can't do something significant, so I'm not going to bother" I've made a list of Things To Do in the context of my practice that can help ensure that I do at least one thing, mindfully, to nurture my spiritual practice and my relationship with my deities and allies.

( Things To Do When I Don't Know What To Do --- In No Particular Order )