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The Descent of Inanna leaves out a crucial part of the story: Inanna's ascent.

Yes, we know she is brought back to life, rises out of the underworld, forbids the demons to take those who love her. . .

But what of all she left behind at the gates? Nothing is said of the crown of the steppes, the breastplate called Come Man Come, the lapis beads. . .

During my first initiation with Ereshkigal, She told me that I had been in a descent for a very long time -- longer than this lifetime. It's time to ascend. It was a wonderful message, a message of hope.

But more complicated than I had realized at first.

One who has been deep in the underworld has been stripped of everything: powers, associations, names. . . As I grope for my tools, my energy, my focus, my faith in myself, I suddenly wonder if part of my task right now is consciously discovering and reclaiming things that have been lost.

Anubis suggested to me a couple of days ago that a soul retrieval might be in order. The more I think about it, the more it makes sense. I have skills. I have desires. I remain mired in obstacles I start to grasp but which strip away without being overcome.

Have I typed this before? Or did I only dream it?

What am I missing?
What do I need to reclaim. . . or claim. . . or create?
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At the beginning of September, I posted about finally "achieving" the Gate: making my way (on the inner) to a particular gate and looking through it. This was much more difficult than it sounds, and even though I finally got there, my assignment was not complete. There was more for me to understand about what I was seeing. That was clear to me, even without the confirmation from my teacher.

This morning, after doing yoga and The Rising Light Below, I sat down to pray. After a while I realized that it was time to go back to the Gate.

I had been assuming (hoping!) that once I'd found my way there it would be easy in the future. No such luck. Fortunately, there was someone powerful who was willing to help.

What I had seen the first time was very much like the image in this icon, although I didn't understand what (or who?) it was. It was very beautiful, obviously powerful, and completely incscrutable to me.

Finding my past and my future )
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