Centered

[qos]

I was just going through an old notebook, sifting out what information and creative work needed to be transferred and what I should let go of -- and I found something that made me feel very good.

There's a page from July of 2006 that is full of notes about various archetypal roles, heroines, totems, tools, correspondences, and etc. I was trying to make a map of all the different elements of myself and find some way to make it coherent.

On the other side is the title "The Same Damn List" and it's four columns (each a different area of my life) of issues that I felt needed to be changed/improved/dealt with. They aren't lengthy lists, but they were depressing in the persistence of the items on them, stuff I'd never managed to get a handle on or overcome.

As I set the page aside, deciding I didn't need to keep it, I realized how far I've come since then. I no longer feel the need to map and label the parts of myself to try to pin down a sense of identity and purpose. I've dealt with a fair number of the items on that Damn List.

I feel centered, whole. I have far more confidence in myself as a whole person than I did last year.

It's a good feeling.

Comments

[oakmouse]

Yay! One, glad to hear you've got this kind of concrete evidence of real progress. Two, good for you!

[wlotus.livejournal.com]

This is a major, huge deal. Congratulations!

[a-belletrist.livejournal.com]

I hope your Saturday is nourishing you, and bringing you all kinds of good juju. It sounds as if it is.

This is huge stuff, my friend. HUGE! Mazel tov!!

[wordweaverlynn.livejournal.com]

That's wonderful.

[queenofhalves]

yay! *hug*