Buffy, Wolfling and Me

[qos]

Wolfling and I have finally started watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer via Netflix. So far we've only seen four episodes, and we're both enjoying it -- but watching it with Wolfling is sometimes a surreal experience. I keep getting caught up in the fact that Buffy is living this freaky, dangerous, double life and all her mom knows is that she gets in trouble at school a lot. I find myself saying, Promise me that if you ever end up fighting vampires you'll let me know, okay? And Wolfling grins and promises.

Except that the last time the subject came up, I said, You know, it would probably be easier for you to tell me you're out hunting vampires than it would be for you to tell me about some of the real things that you could find yourself involved with. I hope you'll tell me about that too. She assured me she will.

She's only thirteen, and she still enjoys hanging out with her mom, who she considers to be as "weird" as she herself is. I don't think she fully understands just how much distance can develop once a kid is in the midst of adolescence. I keep hoping that her awareness of the richness and complexity (and yes, "weirdness") of my own life will make it easier for her to share things with me as she gets older. Only time will tell.

Meanwhile I watch the mother's painfully awkward attempts to "understand" her daughter, and remind myself how important it is to be consistent in my own efforts to keep communication open, express interest in her, share my own life, connect.

The other surreal aspect is that the show that sometimes hits close to home in the area of our own practices. Last night we watched an episode called "The Witch" in which a classmate's mother was discovered to be an evil witch. We were entertained by the over-the-top melodrama, including a spooky hidden room with a cauldron and poppets where Mom cast her spells, and then I excused myself to go upstairs to my room to do my own magical practices. We all know there's a huge difference between Hollywood spooky stereotypes and real magic, but it was still an interesting moment.



Side note to MT: We're both really enjoying David B's appearances as Angel after having spent the last several years with him as Booth!

Comments

[stucco33.livejournal.com]

Dylan and I watched all of Buffy a couple years ago and absolutely loved it. He bought me season 1 for my birthday and now we are watching it, with the intention to go through the whole series again. It's even better the second time!

By the way, it may be my internal teenage girl talking, or maybe the jet lag, but I watched the movie Twilight on the plane and I thought it was actually kind of fun. Impossibly gorgeous people, good music, good fun. But I seem to be unable to find anyone who does not think me mad for saying so. I would not recommend it to anyone who is not at least part teenage girl, but it's not horrid, IMO.

[qos.livejournal.com]

Wolfling tore through the entire Twilight series in record time, but she wasn't all that excited about the movie.

A couple of months back one of my friends here posted a link to an essay about Twilight as a classic adolescent girl awakening sexuality story. I have no desire to read the books, but the way the author of the essay described them I could easily imagine my younger self gravitating to them. My own stories of that time certainly had many of the thematic elements she listed.

[rebeccax.livejournal.com]

Wow. When I was 13 my mother was the enemy and I was getting high with my friends. No, I didn't tell her about my shoplifting jaunts either.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

Some of those early episodes of Buffy are pretty cheesy.

There will always be things our adolescent children don't tell us. It's right there should be a certain growing apart.

[qos.livejournal.com]

There will always be things our adolescent children don't tell us. It's right there should be a certain growing apart.

I agree.

I guess I'm hoping that we can find a happy medium. I don't want to be utterly clueless about what's going on with her, and I don't want her to consider me an enemy, but it is appropriate that we go through a separation process as she matures and becomes independent.

[watcher457.livejournal.com]

This kind of reminds me of Monday's episode of Castle. They were investigating the death of a high society teenager and Rick Castle gets so spooked by what these teens are up to that he sits down with his daughter (who is probably your daughter's age or a little older) and has this almost desperate "you know you can tell me anything, right?" talk. That particular mini-subplot plays out in an adorable and lovely way.