In Which My Spiritual Critique Rebounds

[qos]

Over the past few years I've come to deplore the degree to which some institutionalized religions reduce faith to "afterlife insurance": where there is so much focus on spirituality and morality as a means to achieve a desireable afterlife, it overlooks the positive impact that spirituality can -- and I believe should have on this life.

If a spiritual path doesn't have a life-changing, life-enhancing impact in the here and now, then -- in my not-so-humble opinion -- something is fundamentally wrong.

So what did I realize this morning?

My spiritual life has become far too otherworldly, far too focused on the afterlife, not enough engaged in this life. I've become the image of what I've claimed is radically wrong with the practices of others.

I was warned from the beginning that this is a risk of the underworld path, and the fact that my soulmate is now in the afterlife has significantly increased the risk.

I've spent a long time -- longer than just the past couple of years -- exploring and understanding the Mysteries of Descent. It's time to undergo an initiation of Ascent.

But I find the prospect frightening. Part of me would far rather remain curled up in the underworld.

It may be that part of me has always been there -- which may be one reason why ambition and achievement have been so elusive for me in this lifetime.

I don't know. I have to explore this further.

But this is part of an increasingly urgent sense of the necessity of making changes that has been growing this week.

A few more things need to come together for me to know what to do. Some medical test results and finding a counselor are part of that process. But I expect that this weekend is going to involve another long session of introspection, contemplation and conversations.

Comments

[lupagreenwolf.livejournal.com]

Maybe it took til now for you to really be ready to bring these things together?