Overwhelmed
Feb. 6th, 2008 04:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
qosSuddenly, everything is almost too much. It's not enough that I'm still mostly in boxes, and I have my Pantheacon class to finish, and Wolfling's room looks like a rat's nest and she has a science fair project she needs help with, and the groceries are running low. . . work just ratcheted up about four levels in intensity, and instead of having the expected good/fun day both my boss and I had curves thrown at us that are stressing us out, and I'm suddenly working overtime which is good for my finances but not welcome this particular week.
More than anything else, I wish I could look forward to going home to a partner and a pair of sheltering arms -- and being aware of that lack pushes me over the line and threatens to put me into tears right here at my desk.
I can take all the madness the world has to give, but I won't last a day without you.
But I can't really say that, can I?
It's been 251 days, and I'm still here.
(And no, I haven't been counting. I had to look it up.)
I'm going to stop typing now.
This isn't helping my mood or my resilience.
I just needed to take a moment and stop and acknowledge my feelings instead of dishonoring them by pretending I'm just tired.
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(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:42 am (UTC)Thank you.
Love the new icon, btw!
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 12:24 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:43 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 12:30 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:43 am (UTC)Thank you.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 12:33 am (UTC)Hugs.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:44 am (UTC)*hugs
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:56 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 12:56 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:44 am (UTC)Thank you.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 12:59 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:45 am (UTC)Thank you.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:46 am (UTC)*hugs
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 02:26 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:46 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 03:22 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:47 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 03:43 am (UTC)I don't know if you do this sorta woo woo thing but I thought I'd mention it. Doing a ritual cleansing and consecration of the house might help.
I know I've forgotten that before and been confused and uncomfortable in the new place until I could do so.
And I know your still unpacking and all, I just figured it might help make the home feel more comforting.
Anyhoo, take care.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:49 am (UTC)This is indeed the kind of woo-woo thing I do -- but I haven't done a full-scale consecration. The first things I brought into the house were the elements of my household altar, but I need to at least smudge the whole place.
What I really need, however, is to do some cleansing and consecrating of my space at the office. I keep forgetting to do that.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:44 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:50 am (UTC)I've found that a lot of people have had bad days today.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 05:41 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 07:52 am (UTC)And still, even though it seems you can't cope, you have been coping so far!
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 12:17 pm (UTC)I hope you can get through to the weekend then spend some time straightening the new place out, and then sitting down in it and enjoying just being there.
take care of yourself.
V
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 04:57 pm (UTC)Good for you for acknowledging your feelings... that takes a lot of self-honesty and a certain degree of guts.
Warmth to you.
*tea?*
(no subject)
Date: 2008-02-07 07:47 pm (UTC)