What I've Lost

[qos]

I only just realized one reason why I’m having such a hard time coping with daily life these days.

It’s not just the grief of Lohain’s loss and the end of the romantic relationship with Lee, or the ongoing frustration of the day job.

I’ve lost the nurturing presence of two loving men in my home.
I’ve lost kisses for every reason and for no reason at all.
I’ve lost hugs when I leave for work in the morning and when I return at night.
I’ve lost encouraging emails and loving voicemails throughout the day.
I’ve lost strong arms holding me as I go to sleep at night.
I’ve lost toe-curling, soul-soaring lovemaking.
I've lost bdsm scenes that challenge and liberate me.
I’ve lost snuggles and laughter and discussions when watching movies together.
I’ve lost company and cheerfulness when doing my household chores.


In short: I’ve lost what had been an ever-present, ever-bountiful source of nourishment for my heart and soul.


No wonder life is so hard right now.
Part of me is starving to death – and I didn’t even realize it until now.

Comments

[tx-cronopio.livejournal.com]

Oh, honey.

As hard as this is, I'm so proud of you for letting yourself grieve. It's going to take time to get over these enormous losses.

On a more trivial note...icon love!

[qos.livejournal.com]

*hugs

No way out but through, right?


I love The Philadelphia Story. And this is a good icon for posting when I am under the influence. I used Arwen first, but this seemed to capture my current state a bit more precisely.

[labelleizzy.livejournal.com]

*hugs*
*sits with you*

[qos.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[oakmouse]

*hugs*

[qos.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

You know your friendship and support mean the world to me.

[oakmouse]

*more hugs*

[wlotus.livejournal.com]

Starvation...yes. That is all I can say.

I hope it gets easier for you.

::hugs::

[qos.livejournal.com]

*hugs

Thank you.

[malakhgabriel.livejournal.com]

I know that I comment very little, but I want you to be aware of my presence in your grieving.

[qos.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

We've both had a lot to deal with these last few months, and I appreciate your comment. I'm sorry I haven't left a similar note on your journal: I don't respond to your entries very often, but you and M are in my thoughts and prayers.

[blessed-harlot.livejournal.com]

I am thinking of you.

[qos.livejournal.com]

*hugs
Thank you.

Here with you, too

[unicorndelamer.livejournal.com]

I'm here, too. And if your couch is getting too crowded with all the friends and loved ones you have piling over to make you feel special, I'll happily go take care of the dishes for you. I can fix up some little snacks, too. Nothing gourmet, mind you, but it would be tasty. :)

At least Monday's over. Only 4 more days until the weekend.

[gothic-coop.livejournal.com]

I am hear with you as well hon. Always watching.

[quietearthling.livejournal.com]

I'm aching for you, and saying a prayer for you right now. *hugs*