Life is Not Good Today

[qos]

I was at work for just short of three hours when my father called me to relay the results of a biopsy: he has prostate cancer. "An aggressive form," I am told.

His most recent physical exam (within the past couple of months) showed the prostate to be smooth and compact, which is good. The doctor won't know if the cancer is contained or not until he can do a bone scan in a couple of weeks.

My dad is on the board of trustees at the HMO, and we are in a region with a major university hospital and a nationally-recognized cancer center. He couldn't be in a better place to get good treatment. And this is an early detection. So as much as can be 'good' about a cancer diagnosis is good.

But I got the news on 5 hours of sleep, and although I held it together on the phone with Dad, I started crying right after. Many blessings on kateri_thinks who got my call five minutes later and let me go into shock with her. Jeannie had just started a 1:1 with one of my co-workers. I went in, apologized, asked for five minutes alone, told her, and broke down in tears. She was wonderful, expressing sympathy and empathy, and agreed that I needed to go home.

On the way home I was able to talk with _storyteller_, who was a warm, fuzzy rock for me.

Then I talked with my sister savannahselkie, and we braced each other up.

Then I got home and the Ex's SO told me that a deputy prosecutor had come to the house earlier with a young woman who had been raped in our neighborhood last October. She couldn't remember which house it was, but when the SO showed them a photo of my Ex, she said it definitely was not him. But that means there is a rapist living in my neighborhood.

And then then SO told me that the Ex (for reasons that have yet to be explained) had been looking at the child molester registry, and there are several red dots in our area.

My daughter will be home from the first day of 5th grade in about 30 minutes. A household tradition (dating back to my own school days) is going out for dinner on the first day of school and then do school supply shopping. I'm not sure I'm going to be up for the latter, but I am definitely going to take her out.

I'm probably going to wait a few days to tell her about dad's diagnosis. Today she would have been brought face to face with the reality of the murder of her school's librarian a month or so ago, and she just was saddened by the Croc Hunter's death. I don't want to throw this on her as well, especially when she too didn't get much sleep last night and today should be fun and exciting day for her.

However, if you all could continue sending positive energy my way -- and pray for my dad -- I would sure appreciate it.

Comments

[toesontheground.livejournal.com]

Aiii.

*hugs*

I'm glad you have a good support network there at a time like this.

Kia kaha.

[rachel-y.livejournal.com]

((Qos)). Hope you're able to get through tonight okay and that tomorrow treats you better.

FWIW, the sex offender registry maps can look scarier than they necessarily are...*so* many offenses can get you labelled a sex offender...Urinating in public...statutory rape (bummer for the 19yo having consensual sex w/ a 17yo girlfriend if her parents find out and press charges)...to crimes where someone is actually victimized.

[kateri-thinks.livejournal.com]

(((((((((((((you))))))))))))))

Dear qos,

Lit candles,
many prayers,
lotsa "fuck",
ditto hope.

Love, me.

[(Anonymous)]

Prayers for an excellent prognosis and a speedy recovery.

[don-negro.livejournal.com]

That was me.

[qos.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[southernselkie.livejournal.com]

Eew... And the hits just kept coming. I'm so sorry. HUGE HUG I will send you lots of thoughts of peace, love, and strength tonight. Yeah, I lost it once Sean and I left the lot and started driving home. He's wondeful... especially since he just lost his father to cancer last month.

If you need anything, call me. We are in this together, and I know we can hold each other up.

Love you

[iswari.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad and how stressful today has been. Much love...

[http://users.livejournal.com/_storyteller_/]

You have my support.

Those maps are iffy at best.

I will not say that there is nothing to worry about. But you can face each of these issues in turn and provide support to the ones you love. The strength that you can give your family now is priceless.

[bookchick.livejournal.com]

::hugs::

let me know if there's anything i can do.

[qos.livejournal.com]

*hugs back*

Thank you. . .

[queenofhalves]

hard news. prayers and hugs.

Hugs and prayers.

[vsmallgoddess.livejournal.com]

So sorry to hear about all of this. Much love and support is being sent your way, both literally and figuratively. Don't be a stranger. We love you and the daughter muchly. Take extra good care of yourself. God does not give us anything we can not handle.
--J and P.

Re: Hugs and prayers.

[qos.livejournal.com]

Thank you both. I'm grateful to still have your love and friendship through all that's been happening.

[rhonan.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[qos.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Rhonan

[royalbananafish.livejournal.com]

My ex-fiance's stepfather was diagnosed with prostate cancer of a scary kind, had surgery, and is just fine now. He became something of an expert on the topic, at least from a layperson's view, and even went to conventions and did speaking and stuff.

You and yours are in my prayers.

[qos.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the prayers and for the reminder of hope.
It is early detection.
This type of cancer is treatable.
This is not an automatic death sentence.

It's scary, but it's just the first phase of a journey that could have many outcomes.

[wlotus.livejournal.com]

Prayers and love heading your way.

[gothic-coop.livejournal.com]

My father-in-law was diagnosed with prostate cancer. Honestly if it is caught during a physical exam then it most of the time a very treatable thing.

You and your father will be in my heart. I will say a blessing tonight when I get home.

You need something please feel free to call.

[blessed-harlot.livejournal.com]

I am so sorry to hear about your dad's diagnosis. Ditto what has been said already about the presence of many hopeful facts, but that it still a heavy burden to bear. I am praying for your whole family. I also know what strength I've seen reflected in all of you, even from this distance. You yourself have many gifts that will be special blessings to you, your dad, and your daughter during this time.

[professor-mom.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry to hear about this! *hugs* I understand that prostrate cancer is pretty widespread among men in their 60's and 70's and that a lot of it is very slow growing and in fact they're finding that not treating it at all is the way to go with some of it. I hope your dad's cancer is the slow kind. *hugs*

I know what you mean about the predators, though. I did a search on my mom's neighborhood and she had several predators in the neighborhood. I hate it.