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Getting Used to It
Apr. 7th, 2008 06:20 pmI realized while driving to work today that I've gotten used to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
uncrowned_king being gone.
It wasn't a pleasant sensation.
Of course I don't want to be crying over his death for the rest of my life. . . . and it would be ridiculous and unhealthy to resist adjusting to the reality of his loss. . . but some part of me thinks it is fundamentally wrong for it to be in any way "okay" that he's gone. On some level, it feels like a betrayal -- even though I know he would not/does not feel that way.
Or maybe it's just that the pain of his loss has settled into a quiet, deep channel. It's still there on some level, but it's no longer storming and flooding.
It's a little more than a month until the anniversary of his death.
We can only ever go forward.
uncrowned_king being gone.It wasn't a pleasant sensation.
Of course I don't want to be crying over his death for the rest of my life. . . . and it would be ridiculous and unhealthy to resist adjusting to the reality of his loss. . . but some part of me thinks it is fundamentally wrong for it to be in any way "okay" that he's gone. On some level, it feels like a betrayal -- even though I know he would not/does not feel that way.
Or maybe it's just that the pain of his loss has settled into a quiet, deep channel. It's still there on some level, but it's no longer storming and flooding.
It's a little more than a month until the anniversary of his death.
We can only ever go forward.
