Mom & Daughter Weekend

The party was a success, with all three kids having fun and behaving well (not that I was worried about the behavior -- they're all great kids). The important thing is that they had fun, and I -- with the considerable support of _storyteller_ -- not only survived, but did so with a reasonable amount of grace.

I have a couple of great photos, but since I haven't asked the other kids' parents for permission to post them, I'm not going to put them up, even under friends lock.

Also had a chance to catch up with B, the father of one of my daughter's friends. He and I used to be very close, but have fallen out of active contact with since we no longer work together. There's a lot of affection still there, however, and the fact that his wife and I were pregnant with our kids at the same time adds another level to the bond. Ironically, he is now working on a business with my Ex, and so gets some family news through that channel. He asked about my dad with genuine concern, and that was nice.

Yesterday afternoon my friend SP came over to consult with the Daughter about her room. She does "intentional design" and I solicited her help with making the Yellow Room into a really great habitat for my daughter. ("Habitat" because the Daughter loves the computer sim game "Zoo Tycoon" in which players create scientifically correct habitat enclosures for the animals and have to maintain them through proper feeding and poop-cleaning.) They spent a lot of time talking about what my daughter wants to be able do to in her room and what she wants, then they went out on a scouting expedition to look at several stores to compare the kinds options available for design, then came back here. It took much longer than originally planned, and my daughter was utterly zonked at the end. SP is coming back to tonight for the next part, which is doing some clearing of the bedroom and initial re-organizing.

The big difference between this clearing and organizing session and others that my mom and I have done with her, is that this time we're going into it with the Daughter having a vision of what she wants, and that's what's going to drive the activity, not my desire for order.

The Interview Meme Comes Round Again

Most of you know the rules:

Leave a comment asking to be interviewed.
I will respond with five questions which you are to answer as a post in your own journal, along with these instructions.


vicarchori asked me:

1. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?
I would live on Whidbey Island, in a home that blended as much as possible with the natural landscape around it and which was big enough for my partners, my daughter and I to co-exist without crowding. It would be set in a wooded area but not too far from the ocean.

2. Describe your ideal kitchen.
One with a full-time staff!
Not being much of a cook, my desires are relatively modest: a good quality stove, maybe one with a grill; a dishwasher; a modern refrigerator-freezer with a drink dispenser in the door; large double sink with a garbage disposal; lots of room for storing both implements and foodstuffs neatly. I’d like a breakfast nook and a window too.

3. What one event or moment completely changed your life?
The single most dramatic moment was the one in which the Void opened before me for the first time. I had just watched A Passage to India and was struck for the first time with the terrible frailty of human existence and the fact that God doesn’t always protect us in the way I had taken for granted throughout my sheltered childhood. I started to believe in my own mortality for the first time, and my entire belief structure crumbled around me in a matter of minutes. It was spring of my sophomore year of college, and I have never been the same since.

4. Describe one of your grandparents.
I think of my mother’s mother as a rather tragic figure. She married a man who abandoned her to raise five children alone. She spent her life living with her children and babysitting the children of others. She got her hair done, played solitaire, and drank Tab. She was sweet and loving, and I while I loved her as a child, I never truly connected with her, never learned anything about her inner life. She developed Alzheimer’s when I was in high school, and came to live with my family. She died around Christmas during my freshman year of college. My sister would probably describe her differently, since I think they connected on a deeper level. I feel sad whenever I think ok of her, and I very much hope she is having a joyous afterlife, because her earthly life was humble and – from where I stood – seemed to be lived primarily at the convenience of others.

5. What famous living person would you like to meet and have extended conversation with? Why?
I’m surprising myself with this one, but I would really like to sit down and have a long, frank discussion with Bush, off the record, and find out what he really thinks about the war, what he feels. Even if I don’t agree with what he tells me, I want to know the truth of his perceptions and beliefs, not what he and his handlers have decided is most politic to say in public.