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Paper, Authority, Solitude
Feb. 20th, 2004 01:26 pmIt's been a stressful couple of days, but last night I finally finished the paper I have to turn in tonight for my christology class, and that felt very good.
I had a tough time writing a paper on Swedenborg's doctrine of the glorification to be read (and graded) by a professor who is a Catholic priest and systematic theologian who had never heard of Swedenborg before I announced my affiliation at the beginning of our fall class together. The first page is one-third footnotes, because he has no background, no context, with which to understand what comes after.
Another challenge was facing my own ambivalence about certain aspects of Swedenborg. I felt uncomfortable presenting certain ideas which I presumed Fr. R would assume I agreed with, but which I actually was still processing and deciding about. That challenge was not fully dealt with; the final paper keeps very closely to ideas that I do feel comfortable being identified with. But there is an issue there that I need to deal with - not just how much of Swedenborg I actually can fully claim as my own, but how I relate to authority figures, especially ones who represent conventional, traditional authority. (There's that "Emperor" issue again.)
I'm looking forward to another two nights at the hotel. This time I've packed my bathing suit, and plan to spend some time in the hot tub - one of my favorite indulgences! I have my journal, my tarot cards, and the reading I didn't finish for the session.
Most of all, I will have uninterrupted silence.
I may start planning a quarterly weekend retreat. This place is $70 a night, which is affordable for a two-nights-every-few-months expenditure, and it comes with a fridge and microwave, so I don't have to depend on restaurants for food. I hadn't realized, until last month's stay, how very long it has been since I had an entire day all to myself, away from everything.
I had a tough time writing a paper on Swedenborg's doctrine of the glorification to be read (and graded) by a professor who is a Catholic priest and systematic theologian who had never heard of Swedenborg before I announced my affiliation at the beginning of our fall class together. The first page is one-third footnotes, because he has no background, no context, with which to understand what comes after.
Another challenge was facing my own ambivalence about certain aspects of Swedenborg. I felt uncomfortable presenting certain ideas which I presumed Fr. R would assume I agreed with, but which I actually was still processing and deciding about. That challenge was not fully dealt with; the final paper keeps very closely to ideas that I do feel comfortable being identified with. But there is an issue there that I need to deal with - not just how much of Swedenborg I actually can fully claim as my own, but how I relate to authority figures, especially ones who represent conventional, traditional authority. (There's that "Emperor" issue again.)
I'm looking forward to another two nights at the hotel. This time I've packed my bathing suit, and plan to spend some time in the hot tub - one of my favorite indulgences! I have my journal, my tarot cards, and the reading I didn't finish for the session.
Most of all, I will have uninterrupted silence.
I may start planning a quarterly weekend retreat. This place is $70 a night, which is affordable for a two-nights-every-few-months expenditure, and it comes with a fridge and microwave, so I don't have to depend on restaurants for food. I hadn't realized, until last month's stay, how very long it has been since I had an entire day all to myself, away from everything.
