The Good, The Bad, and the Piratical

The Good: Re-admission to my school is a simple matter of submitting the "Re-admission to Graduate School" form (1 page, no fee) to the Admissions Office and a letter to my department explaining what I've been doing this past year and how that fits into coming back to school. I already wrote that letter yesterday, when I thought I would send an email instead of picking up the phone.

Also Good: Leaving for Florida early Thursday morning with kateri_thinks!

The Bad: Three guesses.
No, the diamond and opal rings have not been found.

The Piratical: Behind the LJ cut below is a photo of Tommy Lee Jones as a pirate in the movie Nate and Hayes, which I have not seen. Clearly, I need to rectify that state of affairs.

( You can add him to the list of kidnappers from yesterday's meme )

Very Good: Late afternoon emails about plots.

Expensive Diamonds and Pearls of Great Price

I'm writing this in haste, because it's 7:48pm as I begin, and I still have to pack and etc. this evening. But I wanted to get this out and 'on paper' before I left.

When I am ruthlessly honest with myself, I realize this: I don't feel all that much about the loss of my diamond ring. I am disappointed, yes. It's a lovely piece of jewelry, and because of its unusual design it would be very hard to replace even if my Ex or the insurance company gave me the several thousands dollars of the appraisal value. This piece has no particular emotional/sentimental value as a former wedding ring. You all know how I feel about my former marriage.

Ultimately that ring is worthless. The "value" it has is entirely subjective and culturally-conditioned. Yes, it has a cash re-sale value, but when you get right down to it, it's a small piece of yellow metal and a series of clear stones. It won't feed me, nurture me (although it might once have, emotionally, had my marriage turned out differently), or give me any other benefit except as an ornament. And I have other ornaments.

Finding out this morning that getting re-admitted to seminary was going to be easy gave me far more release from stress than I would have felt had the ring been found.

The emails from this afternoon that I alluded to in my last post gave me more pleasure - even joy - than finding my ring would have.

Diamonds are not valuable. Knowing my path and following it with dedication and integrity is valuable. Love, being known and touched on many levels by someone who understands me, is valuable. Having my daughter near me and happy and healthy is important and valuable and worth many sacrifices. Being able to have faith, and taking comfort and courage from it, despite all the terrible things that happen in the world, is valuable.

If I never find that ring again, my life will go on without trauma, without authentic grief. Regret, yes. Some sadness, yes. But not grief. Because when it comes right down to it, that ring is not important.

I have pearls of great price, pearls well worth giving up everything else for.

I don't need diamonds.