Princesses Don't Tend to Become Warriors

A few days ago, I had the doh! realization that one of the reasons why I didn't develop much self-discipline growing up, or any skills in conflict resolution or persistence, was that I really did live a Princess lifestyle. My family was middle-class affluent in a small town -- but I was a King's daughter, and I was smart enough that everything that I needed to do came easily to me, and I was sheltered from any real 'hard knocks.' There was simply no reason and no opportunity to learn persistence, or grit, or the ultimate rewards of repetitive learning.

( Late Night Thoughts )

For me, at this place and time in my life, to begin to truly develop Warrior energy, it starts with simply showing up for my workouts, for respecting myself enough to build the self-discipline, to choose the 'pain' over self-indulgent pleasures with less value, accepting the exertion and fatigue, and respecting the gift of repetitive efforts (which I have always hated). I also need to focus on the fact that it's supposed to be a labor of love. The archetypal Warrior is motivated by love, not hatred or fear or selfishness, or any external demand of what 'should be.'

Right now, I'm still more self-centered than anything -- but I think this is remedial work, work that I need to do on myself in order to make me a healthier person, someone who will be more effective in the world -- starting in my own home. I want my daughter to have a mother who can be a Warrior role model -- and Sovereign, Seer and Lover too, but this seems to be the easiest and most obvious choice of healing/growth activities. I can start here.