Fall Classes

A few days ago, during a lull at work (I think it was the day both Jeannie and Vicki were out of the office), I registered for fall classes. I had been planning to take only one course per quarter, but my advisor pointed out a few weeks ago that at three credits a class, three quarters per year, a 72 credit major would take eight years to complete if I only did one per quarter. That's not what I want. Besides, I still have plenty of basic/prerequisite classes to take and I need to get as many as possible out of the way so I can take the advanced classes as they come up.

So this fall I will be taking "Hebrew Scriptures" on Monday nights, and "Christian Prayer and Spirituality" as a two-weekend class. The advantage to this is that I won't have to be preparing for two classes per week. I am a little nervous about taking two classes, but also glad - because I really do love this coursework.

Moving from the M.Div to the Master of Arts in Transforming Spirituality (MATS) means that I don't have to take any denomination-specific courses or "history and polity" courses. I won't be pursuing a path as a pastor of a church, so I don't need to demonstrate that I'm properly educated in the specifics of my denomination. But I'm still very interested in learning more about Swedenborg and his writings, and I had been planning to take an online class this fall covering Conjugial Love -- also known as Marriage Love.

Conjugial Love (and the "i" in there is not a mis-type or a mistake on my part -- there's some sort of Latin distinction between conjugal and conjugial) is about how marriage love between a man and a woman corresponds to the Divine Nature itself, with the man representing the Divine Wisdom and women the Divine Love. According to Swedenborg, in the afterlife an authentic husband and wife will eventually become a single angelic being with two faces. (The person you're married to in earthly life may or may not be the person with whom you will one day have a heavenly marriage.)

A lot of this makes me break out in hives, as some of you probably already know or can easily imagine after reading that last paragraph. And there is a lively debate going on in the church about how much of CL should be taken as literal and how much as symbolic of the inner marriage of our own masculine/feminine selves and the Divine Love and Wisdom within each of us. My prof from last quarter is working on a new translation of CL which I'm eager to read.

In short, I want to dig into this work and find out more about what's there. But that would make three courses this fall, which would be a Big Mistake. On the other hand, it's being taught by the infamous Prairie Dog Professor, who only put in three or four appearances online fall quarter last year, so I doubt that much would be demanded of us. In any case, since I don't need the credit, I'm going to see about auditing, and get what education I can without the need to do the writing, and not worry that at the end I won't have a piece of paper with this particular credential on it.

The Queen of Wands/Brigid/Death

I think I've already mentioned that on the Solstice I joined with three other woman friends and we had dinner and did tarot readings, and that each one of us had the Queen of Wands come up in a signficiant position. We discussed the fact that we all have these amazing talents and power, but we continue to feel blocked from using them in our lives. What is it that keeps holding us back? We didn't come up with any truly satisfying answers.

As I was leaving, I saw a couple of bats flying through the late twilight. I never see bats around here.

The next day, we all exchanged some emails about the Queen of Wands. I found this link after doing a Google search. It was the first time I had seen the Queen of Wands associated with Kali.

I sent the link to my friends with this comment: I like it because it addresses both power and fear.

There's also the element of creator/destroyer. We talk about transforming the world and systems -- but I don't know if we've addressed the fact that that transformation involves the destruction of the old. Are we comfortable with the destructiveness that walks in the shadow of our joyous creativity? Are we comfortable with the realization that becoming the Queens are meant to be means destroying the smaller selves we have been using to live?

One of the archetypal/mythic roles of the queen-priestess was to perform the sacrifice of the consort who had outlived his virility. Or at least to decree his death at the hands of the priest/esses. What do we need to sacrifice? What was once beloved (perhaps still is?) but must "die" if the realm is to survive and thrive into the future?

Something for me to think about, at least.

( Synchronicities )

Then yesterday afternoon I got to the gym early. I started to write in my paper journal about how the the Queen of Wands expresses wisdom and power in an active, embodied way that the often-detached Queen of Swords does not. Then I started browsing through earlier pages. Months ago I was writing about the Queen of Wands and the need to be more embodied. I wrote about the Dragon (my mythological totem) as a symbol of embodied wisdom.

Then there's the issue of the passion I've been hungering for and slowly re-kindling in my life -- also part of the Queen of Wands.

Passion. Embodiment. Death. Re-birth. The signals are coming in clear and strong from the universe. So now I need to actually do the work of becoming more embodied, and hopefully that will lead me to what needs to die - and what needs to be born or re-born.

Oh My Goodness

Thanks to nixnivis -- the first person I've seen who posted the Quiz Link with her results!

My own results are somewhat disturbing. . . Although there is some good stuff once you get past the underlying assumption that I'm going to put out a hit on anyone who doesn't fall into line with my agenda and mood. However, given my recent feud with Miss Vicki, I have to admit that I can see that tendency in action. In my own defense, I will add that I am capable of moving past the "mob boss" tendencies to find a more constructive way of dealing with people.

You are an SRDL--Sober Rational Destructive Leader. This makes you a mob boss. You are the ultimate alpha person and even your friends give you your space. You can't stand whiners, weaklings, schlemiels or schlemozzles. You don't make many jokes, but when you do, others laugh out loud. They must.

People often turn to you for advice, and wisely. You are calm in a crisis, cautious in a tempest, and attuned to even the finest details. Yours is the profile of a smart head for business and a dangerous enemy.

You have a natural knack for fashion and occupy a suit like a matinee idol. Your charisma is striking and without artifice. You are generous, thoughtful, and appreciate life's finer things.

Please don't kick my ass.

This Was More Fun

From Tickle: What Style of Movie Are You?

Groundbreaking Documentary

If you think documentaries are boring, think again. Like your movie match, you're an intelligent individual who makes people think. Documentaries span all sorts of topics, from the trivial to the profound. Perhaps your interests do the same, but one thing's clear — you're a smarty and you like to learn.

We'd guess you're the person at the dinner table or the water cooler who stirs up lively debates about the latest news or tidbits from the Discovery Channel. Part of you probably gets a kick out of creating controversy and getting people fired up about their beliefs. Another part probably likes opening people's eyes and sharing your thoughts. And for that, you get two thumbs up for trying to get to the bottom of things and making waves!

http://web.tickle.com/tests/moviekind/

I'm "tickled" by the fact that the description refers to all sorts of topics, "from the trivial to the profound" -- given the title of my LJ.