qos: (Arwen Mourning)
qos ([personal profile] qos) wrote2007-06-02 04:26 pm
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Being Okay With Not Being Okay

[livejournal.com profile] _storyteller_ went out with my daughter and I this afternoon to run a couple of errands. We're each dealing with Lohain's death in our own way, and we're both still in shock and dealing with his loss on many levels. For myself, my initial storms of weeping are over, leaving me numb, pseudo-normal.

I almost started crying when, during the drive home, the only thing I could think of to talk about was the weather. Then I realized that neither of us is "normal" or "okay" right now.

For the time being, I have to be okay with the fact that we are not okay.
It's part of the process.
But it hurts.

Normal

[identity profile] qos.livejournal.com 2007-06-03 01:31 am (UTC)(link)
I hadn't reached the point of even beginning to realize that my new normal will be different from the old one.

Thank you for that wisdom.