Home and Family

[qos]

It's hard to put in a more than full day at work and then come home and try to cook dinner.

I realize that that's probably not news to anyone who reads this, but it's a particular source of stress for me. However, tonight I followed the meal plan The Child and I put together on Sunday, and instead of doing drive-through, going back out for a sit-down restaurant meal, or simply throwing a quesadilla on the mini-grill, I dragged out my South Beach Diet cookbook and made Oven-Baked Almond Chicken. (Okay, so I ate a few potato chips to take the edge off first -- but I still cooked dinner.)

The big hitch was that when I was shopping I decided to forgo buying "whole wheat breadcrumbs," because I have plenty of bread at home that can be chopped up. Unfortunately, given my lack of experience in such things, it quickly became clear this evening that what I had produced was more in the way of mini-croutons than "crumbs." So I ended up doing some extra knife chopping, and then simply sinking my hands into the breading mix (also containing ground almonds, some parmesan cheese, oregano, etc.) and making it all as small as I could. Which was unexpectedly fun. And it turned out pretty well. I'm sure it will be better with actual crumbs, but it was good.

And while I was eating my father called. His opening words: "I'd like you to make a pastoral call."

Okay, Dad, you've got my attention.

It turns out that my uncle (his sister's husband) is in the hospital with cancer, a punctured bowel, and general other Not-Good things. He is down to 122 pounds, which is terrifying. Dad wasn't going to ask me to drive out to the hospital (which is an hour or more from where I live) but he did ask that I call my aunt.

That aunt and uncle are not people with whom I'm especially close. They are fairly conservative Christians, and there isn't much to bring us together beyond family holiday celebrations. They are kind people, and have always treated me with respect, even when I've divorced, or taken up with a heterodox Christian group (the Swedenborgian church), but we don't have a lot that we share except love for my dad.

Well, when Dad calls me and appeals with those words, it's hard to say no. But there was no answer at their house, so I left a message for my aunt, invited her to call me if she felt like she wanted to talk, and told them I'd be praying for them.

If anyone else has prayers to spare for my "other" Uncle Fred (my mother's sister's husband Fred died two years ago), they would be welcome.

Comments

[toesontheground.livejournal.com]

It's hard to put in a more than full day at work and then come home and try to cook dinner.

Yep. My main strategy has been to learn a bunch of ways to cook really fast meals that are still nutritionally ok - and to have pantry/freezer that is stocked with stuff that allows this. But it still is hard. I remember with nostalgia my student flatting days when we had one day a week to cook, so on that day we'd do a good job of it, and for the other four nights enjoy other people's efforts, and do our own thing on the weekend. Very sensible!

[qos.livejournal.com]

Right now, my daughter enjoys cooking, although she's too young to do so alone. Hopefully she will continue to enjoy it as she gets older, and then we'll be able to trade off. But that's still a couple of years in the future.

[chipchat.livejournal.com]

This Saturday marks a year since my mother died from cancer. It was a horrible way for her to go - and she knew for a long while that it was terminal.

But there was one remarkable thing that happened during her illness. For a long time, she thought that my Dad and her were not the kind of people that had many friends. She thought they just went about their business and, if they dropped off the face of the planet, hardly anyone would notice and fewer would care.

Which is why she was astonished by the wealth and the warmth of support that she received from people who she thought were only acquaintances. When her time came, she knew without a shadow of a doubt that she was loved and that she was important to people - even to those she had thought she had little in common with - and that was a precious gift to her in those last months.

The gift I enjoyed was being able to talk about all kinds of things with her that we had never really talked about before - things she did as a girl, how she met my Dad, the ambitions she felt she'd achieved. It's just a damn shame it took what it did for those topics to come up.

I don't know how much this helps - but I just thought it might be useful for you to see things through the other side of the window. My best wishes to your uncle, and to you.

[gothic-coop.livejournal.com]

If anyone else has prayers to spare for my "other" Uncle Fred (my mother's sister's husband Fred died two years ago), they would be welcome.

Consider it done.

[qos.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Coop.

[gothic-coop.livejournal.com]

For you, anything.

[femalegamer.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry to hear about your uncle... even if you aren't close. Somehow, trying to have feelings for relatives you aren't around much, don't like much or just don't know seems to have an added layer of ... of. Darn it, I can't think of a good word. Difficulty? Sighing? Guilt?

My grandmother died earlier this year from complications of Parkinson's, and I realized how long it was since I had seen her. It was just so difficult with her getting farther and farther from coherence or even wakefulness, but it still added onto the shock and sorrow of "Grandma Fish is dead".

On a plus note, I thought I would comment that I'm trying South Beach, since you mentioned the cook book. 33 pounds since September, and I hope to figure out soon why I'm not losing anymore.

[qos.livejournal.com]

My dad was diagnosed with Parkinson's a year or so ago. So far, the symptoms have mostly been controlable with drugs, but it's scary to see him declining.

Great to hear about your South Beach losses! I'm not "following it" per se, but trying to some of their healthier meals into my own diet plan. And their Maple Nut bars are the only diet bars that I really like.

It's perhaps the obvious answer to the plateau you're experiencing, but how is your exercise going? Do you need to up the intensity there?

[femalegamer.livejournal.com]

Exercise is probably the obvious answer and I'm lazy. :) It's one of those - I know what I need to do, I just need to make myself do it.


And I'm sorry to hear that about your dad - I had no idea when I told my little story. I also can say I don't know how long my grandmother had been diagnosed... and it looks like they have a lot more promising research these days, particularly if the government gets their heads out of their butts and gives more money to stem cell research.